18 conflict questions
For personal / provocative
- 1
What is the fight we keep having that we have never actually resolved?
- 2
When we argue, what do you most wish I understood?
- 3
What do you do when you are hurt that I might be reading as something else?
- 4
What is the last thing you forgave me for without telling me?
- 5
Is there something you are still holding onto from an old argument?
- 6
Do we talk about difficult things enough?
- Not nearly enough
- About right
- Too much - I need a break sometimes
- 7
When you are upset, what do you actually want from me?
- To be listened to
- To be left alone for a bit
- To be held
- To be helped to fix it
- 8
How do you know when I am angry with you, and how often are you right?
- 9
What do you say in your head during our arguments that you never say out loud?
- 10
Which of my apologies did not land, and what would have?
- 11
What is a topic you have stopped raising because it never goes anywhere?
- 12
When I go quiet, what do you think is happening, and what is actually happening for you?
- 13
What do you think I sacrifice for us that you have never acknowledged?
- 14
When something is wrong between us, what do you usually do first?
- Go quiet and wait
- Bring it up straight away
- Get busy with something else
- Talk to someone else about it
- Pretend it is fine
- 15
What is a tiny thing that annoys you that you have decided to live with?
- 16
Which of us is more stubborn, and about what?
- 17
What is a disagreement we have that is actually fun?
- 18
What do you think we argue about that is really about something else?
Try answering these at the same time
Reading a question out loud means whoever answers first sets the tone for everyone else. In Answersealed you each answer privately, and the answers only open once everyone has replied — so you get what people actually thought.
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